Haunted - Chuck Palahniuk

[Leath]

Palahniuk un yeni kitabi "Haunted" den kisa bir bolum sunacagim size simdi.(Fight Club u yazan adam)

Kitabin icinde asagida okuyacaginiz gibi bircok kisa hikaye var ve palahniuk kitabindan bir bolumu bir imza gununde okudugunda kusanlar ve kendinden gecenler olmus,ben kusmadim,kendimden de gecmedim ama daha once yasamadigim turden "OOMFG" dedirten bi zihinsel duruma girmeme sebep oldu,buyrun efenim :


------------------------------------------

Guts
By Chuck Palahniuk


Inhale.

Take in as much air as you can.

This story should last about as long as you can hold your breath, and then just a little bit longer. So listen as fast as you can.

A friend of mine, when he was thirteen years old he heard about "pegging." This is when a guy gets banged up the butt with a dildo. Stimulate the prostate gland hard enough, and the rumor is you can have explosive hands-free orgasms. At that age, this friend's a little sex maniac. He's always jonesing for a better way to get his rocks off. He goes out to buy a carrot and some petroleum jelly. To conduct a little private research. Then he pictures how it's going to look at the supermarket checkstand, the lonely carrot and petroleum jelly rolling down the conveyer belt toward the grocery store cashier. All the shoppers waiting in line, watching. Everyone seeing the big evening he has planned.

So, my friend, he buys milk and eggs and sugar and a carrot, all the ingredients for a carrot cake. And Vaseline.

Like he's going home to stick a carrot cake up his butt.

At home, he whittles the carrot into a blunt tool. He slathers it with grease and grinds his ass down on it. Then, nothing. No orgasm. Nothing happens except it hurts.

Then, this kid, his mom yells it's suppertime. She says to come down, right now.

He works the carrot out and stashes the slippery, filthy thing in the dirty clothes under his bed.

After dinner, he goes to find the carrot and it's gone. All his dirty clothes, while he ate dinner, his mom grabbed them all to do laundry. No way could she not find the carrot, carefully shaped with a paring knife from her kitchen, still shiny with lube and stinky.

This friend of mine, he waits months under a black cloud, waiting for his folks to confront him. And they never do. Ever. Even now he's grown up, that invisible carrot hangs over every Christmas dinner, every birthday party. Every Easter egg hunt with his kids, his parents' grandkids, that ghost carrot is hovering over all of them.

That something too awful to name.

People in France have a phrase: "Spirit of the Stairway." In French: Esprit de l'escalier. It means that moment when you find the answer, but it's too late. Say you're at a party and someone insults you. You have to say something. So under pressure, with everybody watching, you say something lame. But the moment you leave the party…

As you start down the stairway, then -- magic. You come up with the perfect thing you should've said. The perfect crippling put-down.

That's the Spirit of the Stairway.

The trouble is even the French don't have a phrase for the stupid things you actually do say under pressure. Those stupid, desperate things you actually think or do.

Some deeds are too low to even get a name. Too low to even get talked about.

Looking back, kid-psych experts, school counselors now say that most of the last peak in teen suicide was kids trying to choke while they beat off. Their folks would find them, a towel twisted around the kid's neck, the towel tied to the rod in their bedroom closet, the kid dead. Dead sperm everywhere. Of course the folks cleaned up. They put some pants on their kid. They made it look… better. Intentional at least. The regular kind of sad, teen suicide.

Another friend of mine, a kid from school, his older brother in the Navy said how guys in the Middle East jack off different than we do here. This brother was stationed in some camel country where the public market sells what could be fancy letter openers. Each fancy tool is just a thin rod of polished brass or silver, maybe as long as your hand, with a big tip at one end, either a big metal ball or the kind of fancy carved handle you'd see on a sword. This Navy brother says how Arab guys get their dick hard and then insert this metal rod inside the whole length of their boner. They jack off with the rod inside, and it makes getting off so much better. More intense.

It's this big brother who travels around the world, sending back French phrases. Russian phrases. Helpful jack-off tips.

After this, the little brother, one day he doesn't show up at school. That night, he calls to ask if I'll pick up his homework for the next couple weeks. Because he's in the hospital.

He's got to share a room with old people getting their guts worked on. He says how they all have to share the same television. All he's got for privacy is a curtain. His folks don't come and visit. On the phone, he says

[crudgel_05]

enteresan ayrıca fight club da favorilerim arasındadır[signature][hline]Nobody is perfect!!!

[arc]

rekor bişi kesinlikle rekor.[signature][hline]sanerixx, never change a winning nickname!
msn => [email protected]

[Mix]

türkçesi çıktı mı acaba? çıkacak mı? cıkarsa etkisini kaybeder mi?

"tıkanma" güzel bi sekilde çevrilmişti bence. bu adamın yazdıkları gerçekten iç sıkıyor.[signature][hline]Hayat bir kavgadır... İlk düşmanın sensin!

[555]

bu adamın görünmez canavalarını okumuştum ve çok beğenmiştim.bu da iyimiş :)[signature][hline]la petite ezique

[Mix]

henüz okumadım ama yarın öss den sonra okuyacam. tekrar tesekkurler sir[signature][hline]Hayat bir kavgadır... İlk düşmanın sensin!

[Mix]

oha diyebildim. mükemmel yazıyo ve gerçekten yukardaki arkadasın dedigi gibi: "bu adam insanları rahatsız etmesini iyi biliyor"
çok güzel, çok başarılı, çok iğrenç. defalarca ara verdim ve mide bulantım geçince devam ettim okumaya.[signature][hline]Hayat bir kavgadır... İlk düşmanın sensin!

[helena]

son derece güzel bi yazıydı bence , her ne kadar rahatsız edici olsa da. her ne kadar rahatsız edici desek de zaten, günümüz dünyasında insanlar kendileri mümkün olduğunca çok kitleye dinletebilmek, dikkat çekebilmek için hoş olmayan ama gerçek olan herşeyi kulağa hoş gelmeyecek şekilde anlatmak zorundalar.[signature][hline]"zamanı gelmiş bir düşünceyi durdurabilecek hiçbir ordu tanımıyorum"

[Mix]

bugün baya aradım kadıköydeki kitapçıları. henüz türkçesi çıkmamış[signature][hline]Hayat bir kavgadır... İlk düşmanın sensin!
Sweet boy come in, im the dark side of you...

[sir]

ve sonunda bu tatilde okudum, bitirdim. insanı yer yer zorlayan, yer yer güldüren, yer yer ağlatan, ve sonunda muhakkak değiştiren, kışkırtan, delirten oldukça etkileyici bir kitap, herkese şiddetle tavsiye ediyorum, türkçeye ne zaman çevrilir bilemiyorum ama..[signature][hline]abandon your life for three months..

[Mix]

yılbaşı gibi türkçeye çevrilir dedi Penguen yayınevi bana.

biraz geç, ama sabredeceğiz artık:)[signature][hline]"Think of me long enough
to make a memory..."

Nightwish
TarjaT.